Many people dream of their wedding day their entire life. Of course I am one of them, but more than anything, I was looking forward to our honeymoon. This should not come as a surprise to anyone considering that I am a known travel addict that hops on a plane any chance I get.
Don’t get me wrong. My wedding was amazing. Although small and simple, my husband and I were surrounded by our closest friends and showered with so much love the entire day. We received such an outpouring of support and well wishes from everyone we know. Best of all, we got to take vows and celebrate our love.
But still. A chance to go on a much needed vacation after the stress of wedding planning and travel with the love of my life to experience unforgettable adventures? Yes. Much more appealing to me. I was counting down the days.
Before I divulge all the details of our magical trip, I wanted to share something I discovered along the way. There were several things I realized about honeymoons that debunked myths I had heard repeatedly over the years and can totally confirm are bogus!
Here are 5 myths about honeymoons that you should never fall for:
Myth #1: Honeymoons have to be a big deal.
This could not be further from the truth. It should be whatever you want it to be. Whether you want a smaller honeymoon or to take a trip somewhere exotic and far away, go for it! Me and my husband did a very simple honeymoon. Since we already live in the state of Hawaii [on the island of Oahu], we just island hopped to the other islands of Kaua’i and Maui, which are each about a 30 minute flight away. A lot of people were surprised that a world traveler like myself did not have a more extravagant trip planned to somewhere I have never been before. But since my husband had never been to these islands and I love them both dearly, I wanted him to experience them and the thrill of island hopping before we move. The truth is I travel enough that going “all out” for my honeymoon wasn’t important to me. The point was to spend quality time and cross off bucket list adventures together. Plus, this is just the beginning. I know we’ll take many more big trips together in the future. The funny thing is that these destinations are actually very common places for honeymooners from around the world. So yes they’re close by, and yes I have been before, but they were still very special, beautiful and romantic locations for the occasion. These days, people have so many options! Couples may choose a staycation or have a destination wedding so their wedding is the honeymoon itself. Or it doesn’t even have to be a tropical destination as most people expect. I just heard of a couple who went to New York City on their honeymoon, which is pretty awesome. I believe there should be no pressure to make it the biggest trip of your lives. It can just be the first of many to come. So just go with what you both want at the time and will enjoy the most.
Myth #2: Honeymoons have to cost a lot.
If you want to splurge, by all means go ahead. But once again, you do not have to go all out . Some believe you have to have the best for your honeymoon and live lavishly. First class plane tickets, expensive meals, champagne, and $1000/night bungalow in the Maldives are all nice, but only if you can truly afford it. Most newlyweds are younger, just starting out in life, and beginning to build together so they’re not in a position to spend a ton. It’s much more responsible at this time for couples to save for buying a home or other goals you may have. For us personally, we planned both our wedding and honeymoon knowing we were about to make a big move soon so we were definitely on a budget. But we made it work. All three of our flights were free as we used frequent flyer miles (learn how to do this here!). We utilized a military discount on our hotel rooms to get a great rate. We planned a few activities and a couples massage, but other than that most of our adventures involved driving around and exploring things for free, like beaches and national parks. So overall, it was quite an inexpensive honeymoon. The largest expense honestly was the many decadent meals we had since we love to eat, but even that expense could have been reduced significantly if we wanted to stick to a smaller budget. The point is no one should have to stress over an extravagant honeymoon or go into debt over it.
Myth #3: Honeymoons have to be right after your wedding.
Traditionally honeymoons begin immediately after the wedding. But these days, I feel that is a little outdated and unrealistic. Some people need a little more time and elect to have a honeymoon a few months or a year later, which is totally fine. Maybe you need more time to save, or like a friend of mine, you can’t take time off work just yet. Or maybe you just need time to recover from the wedding and simply aren’t ready. Couples should take as much time as they need, as long as they don’t let life get in the way and forget about going all together. It’s still important to take one and it’s an excuse to travel, so just don’t wait too long or miss out completely.
Myth #4: Honeymoons have to involve you being cooped up in your room.
I looked up the definition of honeymoon and it literally included the words ‘intimacy’ and ‘seclusion’. That is because the typical idea most people have of honeymoons is that you’re going to be in your room getting busy the whole time. I can’t tell you how many people joked about me coming home pregnant (which I do not find funny!) Now I do agree that this is definitely a perfect opportunity to enjoy each other thoroughly and spend plenty of time between the sheets. However, that does not mean that this is all you will do or that you can’t do plenty of other active things. Hubs and I had plenty of down time to be lazy and relax, but we also did a ton of adventurous stuff like tubing, hiking, snorkeling, and journeying up a 10,000 foot mountain to watch the sunrise from above the clouds. The most important thing about a honeymoon to me is the bond you’re forming together. I didn’t even think me and my husband could get any closer, but somehow I do believe this special week alone definitely made our bond even stronger. And luckily, I did not come home pregnant!
Myth #5: Honeymoons have to end after your trip.
Probably the biggest and worst myth of them all. You have heard people say “the honeymoon is over” or refer to newlyweds as being in the “honeymoon phase” but I think that is total nonsense. You can still keep that passion and excitement alive for years to come and throughout your whole marriage if you really make the effort. I was pretty sad when our honeymoon was over and we were on our way home. But then I realized, it doesn’t end here! Every day with my husband is a dream come true to me, even a regular work day or days when we do absolutely nothing. I try to plan lots of fun stuff for us and we always make sure to have awesome date nights at least once a week no matter how busy we are. In fact, the very weekend after we returned we went to see a comedy show, had a paint class, and then did fun things with friends like a picnic and taking a boat out to the sandbars. Your life together is going to be as exciting and fun or as dull and boring as you let it be. Keep wearing lingerie, planning dates, surprising each other, and being head over heels in love. There is absolutely no reason why the romance of your honeymoon can’t last forever.
Bottom line: A honeymoon is a very personal thing and should be whatever you and your partner desire the most. If you want to wait and save up so you can go all out, don’t feel bad. If you want to do something small so you can do it right away like we did, that works too. What is really dope to me is when couple do whatever they want, not what everyone else does. Don’t be afraid to do something different or non-traditional, as long as it suits you and your desires. This is your one and only honeymoon with the person you love, so whatever you do, make every moment count.
So how did our honeymoon go? Read part 2 for a day-by-day travel diary with all the details and photos of our AMAZING honeymoon………. Coming soon!